Hi friend,
Your nervous system’s reactions are wise, and they are also conditioned. They’re shaped by what you’ve lived, what you’ve survived, and what your body learned early on about love, safety, and connection.
You’ve likely heard the idea that if your nervous system doesn’t relax with someone, they aren’t right for you. And while that can be true at times, there’s another layer here that often gets missed.
Sometimes our nervous systems are so wired for chaos that safety feels unfamiliar, and even wrong. Calm can feel boring. Consistency can feel suspicious. Ease can feel like something is missing.
This is where discernment becomes essential.
Sometimes the work is in leaving. And sometimes the work is in staying...gently witnessing what’s surfacing, and allowing healing to happen in the presence of secure, steady love.
Learning to feel at home within ourselves, and in the presence of healthy love, is a practice. It’s not something we think our way into. It’s a process of returning to the body, slowing down, and learning what yes and no actually feel like from the inside; without external opinions or old narratives telling us what should be true.
So I invite you to tune in with curiosity…
What does safe feel like for you? What does your body show you through sensations, words, or images when something isn’t right? And what signals show up when something is steady, nourishing, and supportive?
Building self-trust with yourself is the foundation of a secure relationship. And that trust is built one moment at a time.
Inside this week’s newsletter, you’ll find:
🌑 New Moon in Capricorn Report
This New Moon in Capricorn offers a grounding pause early in the year, inviting clarity around commitment, responsibility, and what you are truly ready to build. What you choose now is meant to be steady, intentional, and built to last.
💗 Somatic Practice: Trusting the Body’s Signals
A gentle, body centered exploration that supports listening to your body’s cues, strengthening self trust, and noticing what helps connection feel steady, supportive, and aligned over time.
📲 New On Instagram: Recent posts and reflections from the feed.
🌙 Check out our recent astrology report:
🕊️ The Latest Rising Woman Posts:
🌿 This Weeks Reflection
What feels familiar isn’t always safe, and what feels safe isn’t always familiar.
✨ Practice for the Week: Trusting the Body’s Signals
Time: 5 to 10 minutes
Purpose: To build awareness of safety, signals, and self trust through direct embodied experience
1. Arriving
Find a comfortable position, seated or lying down. Let your body settle in a way that feels supportive.
Place one hand on your chest and one on your belly, or anywhere that feels good.
Take a few breaths.
2. Orienting to safety
Slowly look around the room you’re in. Let your eyes land on a few objects that feel neutral or pleasant.
Notice:
What tells your body that you are here, now
What helps your system register safety in this moment
See what you notice.
3. Exploring sensation
Bring your attention inward.
Scan your body slowly, without trying to change anything.
See what you notice, what sensations are present?
Notice areas of warmth, tension, ease, or numbness.
4. Meeting yes and no
Bring to mind something in your life that feels supportive or nourishing. It could be a person, a place, or a moment of connection.
Notice what happens in your body.
Does anything soften, open, or warm?
Now bring to mind something that feels mildly uncomfortable, not overwhelming.
Notice what your body does in response.
This isn’t about deciding or analyzing. It’s about learning your body’s language.
5. Staying with yourself
Place a hand on the area that felt most activated or most quiet.
Say inwardly: I’m listening.
Notice what happens when you stay present without fixing, leaving, or pushing.
6. Closing
Take a few breaths and feel the weight of your body again.
Before you return to your day, ask:
What did my body show me about safety today
What would it look like to honor one small signal I noticed
Let the practice end gently, without rushing.
A gentle somatic check in pre-journalling
(2 to 5 minutes before journaling)
Before you write, take a moment to arrive in your body.
Sit or lie down somewhere comfortable. Let your eyes soften or close if that feels supportive.
Bring one hand to your chest or belly, wherever your body naturally wants contact.
Notice your breath without trying to change it.
Notice the weight of your body being held by the surface beneath you.
Ask yourself quietly:
What sensations are present in my body right now?
There’s nothing to fix or shift. This is simply about noticing.
Let this be a moment of listening.
When you feel ready, begin writing from this place.
Guided journaling flow
1. Arriving with safety
In this moment, what does safety feel like in my body?
If safety had a texture, temperature, or rhythm, what would it be?
2. Familiar versus nourishing
What has felt familiar in love for me?
How has my nervous system learned to associate connection with certain feelings or dynamics?
3. Listening to signals
When something isn’t right for me, what does my body show me first?
When something feels supportive or steady, what sensations or emotions arise?
4. Staying connected to myself
What does staying with myself look like when discomfort arises?
How do I know the difference between pushing myself and gently staying present?
5. Rebuilding self trust
Where in my life am I learning to trust my inner signals again?
What helps me feel more at home within myself?
6. Integration
What is one small way I can listen to my body this week?
What does healthy love invite me to practice right now?
As you move through the rest of your week, I invite you to stay close to your body. Notice what it softens toward and what it tightens around. Notice where you override yourself and where you listen.
There is no rush to figure anything out. This work unfolds through awareness, presence, and compassion. Each moment you choose to listen to yourself, you are building the kind of safety that healthy love grows from.
Let this be a week of gentle noticing. Of staying curious. Of remembering that your body is always communicating with you, and that learning to trust yourself is a practice you get to return to again and again.
Love,
Shay
P.S. If you’re ready to experience relationships with more ease (without anxiety, self-doubt, or chasing love) Freedom From Relationship Anxiety is a 6-week journey designed to gently rewire anxious attachment patterns and heal the trust wound beneath them, so your body can learn what safety in love actually feels like.
If you feel the pull to build real inner security and transform your relationship patterns for good, you can begin here.